Pregnancy really is a funny thing....It has creeped by up until the last month or so and now all of a sudden, I'm a month away from my due date! That seems crazy soon, yet not soon enough at the same time ;) I guess with my belly as big as the house now-a-days...people, ALL kinds of people, have begun to ask the questions: "So when are you due?" "You're still pregnant?" "Has he dropped yet? I think so." It's truly bizarre. Only in pregnancy are complete strangers allowed to be so intrusive. It's kind of neat and annoying at the same time. People have started to focus so much on when I will have the baby, that waiting a whole month till my due date seems too long. With all the questions and comments, my mind has started thinking, "okay, let's have this baby already," when really I have a whole month left. I definitely don't want to rush the little guy. I want him as healthy as can be, but am getting more and more excited to meet him by the day.
So, I'm back to trusting God and His perfect timing. Struggling...but really this is easy compared to the other things in life God is asking me to trust Him with...such as: selling our house as we are about to embark on life in a tiny apartment. We're planning to move into the apartment sometime next week. I'll be going on 37 weeks pregnant and am feeling like a water buffalo, useless to help do anything in the way of packing or moving. I will do what I can. I'm actually a little excited to start the move because it means I will be getting our little guy's room put together. I'm excited cause what new mother wouldn't be about putting together a nursery...but also because it's a little bit stressful to not even have his bed together at this point, ONE month away. I am such a procrastinator. I've even surprised myself with the procrastination throughout this pregnancy. Maybe that will change once he's here....I hear people change after having a kid?? Hoping it's for the better... ;)
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Monday, May 3, 2010
so, I'm not in control?
Well, lets see, it's been a couple of days since I (first and) last blogged...meaning I should have plenty to talk about. Friday I took Nadia, our 8 month (ish, maybe 9) german shepherd to get spayed. I had to leave her at the vet office overnight and was actually a little sad about it! As I left the vet, I asked some legitimate questions, such as: "Are you going to feed her?" Maybe not so legitimate...but anyway, I guess the nurse picked up on what a loving and caring mother/owner I am and assured me they would feed her, she'd be fine and I could even call to check on her that afternoon. So I did....and they told me again that she was fine. We expected her to be a little lethargic after such a traumatic surgery, but as soon as we picked her up Sat. morning, she was same ol' crazy Nadia and very excited to be leaving.
Anyway, dropping my dog off for surgery and an overnight stay at the vet gave me a tiny glimpse into what it would feel like to have a sick child and I do mean TINY glimpse. I probably shouldn't even say that, but what I learned from it was that I really have no control....which is significant because this has been a recurring theme for my life lately...Pregnancy has been such a gift that I am so very grateful for, but it has also opened my eyes to the worrier inside me.
God has been trying to teach me to trust Him, COMPLETELY...with EVERYTHING...and also to find my security in Him alone. He's been hammering this into my hard hard head for quite some time. I'm beginning to get a headache...but loving every minute of it. I know and believe that God is Sovereign and that I MUST trust in Him and find my security only in Him, BUT knowing and doing are oh, so different. I continue to find myself completely stressed and worried over things that are OUT of my control. I'm learning day by day that most things fall into this category which is stressful for a control freak like me...and comforting to someone like B. He's laid back and actually comforted by the fact that he's not in control. It really does make sense. I know God will do it bigger and better than I ever could, so why would I want to have control anyway....
Two of our very best friends were in town for the weekend and we were able to spend some quality time with them. It was really fun and refreshing! They have a little girl who is one week shy of 6 mos. and so stinkin cute. She is such a good baby too! I was very encouraged to spend time with her and am praying my little one will be just as good. Speaking of my little one...he should be here in about a month! yea! I can't wait!
well, that's all for now.
Anyway, dropping my dog off for surgery and an overnight stay at the vet gave me a tiny glimpse into what it would feel like to have a sick child and I do mean TINY glimpse. I probably shouldn't even say that, but what I learned from it was that I really have no control....which is significant because this has been a recurring theme for my life lately...Pregnancy has been such a gift that I am so very grateful for, but it has also opened my eyes to the worrier inside me.
God has been trying to teach me to trust Him, COMPLETELY...with EVERYTHING...and also to find my security in Him alone. He's been hammering this into my hard hard head for quite some time. I'm beginning to get a headache...but loving every minute of it. I know and believe that God is Sovereign and that I MUST trust in Him and find my security only in Him, BUT knowing and doing are oh, so different. I continue to find myself completely stressed and worried over things that are OUT of my control. I'm learning day by day that most things fall into this category which is stressful for a control freak like me...and comforting to someone like B. He's laid back and actually comforted by the fact that he's not in control. It really does make sense. I know God will do it bigger and better than I ever could, so why would I want to have control anyway....
Two of our very best friends were in town for the weekend and we were able to spend some quality time with them. It was really fun and refreshing! They have a little girl who is one week shy of 6 mos. and so stinkin cute. She is such a good baby too! I was very encouraged to spend time with her and am praying my little one will be just as good. Speaking of my little one...he should be here in about a month! yea! I can't wait!
well, that's all for now.
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